My Kids Hate Santa
Ah, Christmas! That magical time of year when random strangers ask my kids what Santa is bringing them and they look like they just walked in on their grandmother naked. The awkwardness in the air is palpable.
Now I'm sure I'm about to get crucified here but I'm just going to say it: We have 4 kids and we don't do Santa. And before you ask me, no, we don't do the Tooth Fairy or the Easter Bunny either. And just to drive it home that we have completely ruined our kids' childhood, we don't even do Elf on the Shelf. The worst part is that we actually have an elf (because my kids wanted one) but I never remember to hide it. And my son likes to remind me that I forgot by hurling "Elfie" at me first thing in the morning with an exasperated sigh.
I don't have any grand reasons for not encouraging Santa Claus. It seemed reasonable to skip the whole thing since my husband didn't do Santa growing up. And I remember when I was about 7 or 8 and feeling so betrayed about being "lied to" when I found out that Santa wasn't real. Although to be fair, I probably should've realized something was off as I was thumbing through the latest Service Merchandise catalog and my mom told me that Santa could only afford to make $50 worth of toys!
I guess it just felt wrong to tell my kids something that wasn't true, especially when it involved a stranger breaking into our house while they slept, even if he was bringing toys. I'm not trying to come off as some sanctimonious parent and I can't claim to always be 100% truthful to my kids. There are definitely times that I have withheld the truth--like when my oldest son was 6 and he asked me what sex was. I told him that we could talk about that or we could go get ice cream-thankfully he chose the ice cream. Or when I would set the house alarm and twins thought that meant that if you weren't out in time, the house was going to explode. I never told them that was true but I didn't exactly discourage it either (I mean, do you know how hard it is to get 4 kids out of the house in a timely manner??).
Of course I realize that parents aren't trying to "lie" to their kids and are just encouraging the magical element of childhood but it just seems weird to me. But really that's not my biggest reason for doing it. Selfishly, I don't like the idea that we work hard to pay for these gifts and some imaginary character gets the credit. Somehow that just doesn't seem fair. I work hard to pay for the presents, I have to track down that hot toy of the season (I swear I have PTSD from the fingerling fiasco of 2017), and then I have to somehow secretly wrap all these presents in the 5 minutes that the baby naps! And boy do I wrap them. Every. Single. Thing. I mean, I'll wrap a pencil if I can. Have you ever tried to unwrap a pencil? It's awful. There's more tape than there is wrapping paper. Eventually you just give up. And if that's not bad enough, I make them open presents one at a time so I can stare at them expectantly, making sure they are responding with the appropriate amount of excitement. I just soak it up.
So, if you see my kids in public and you ask them what Santa is bringing them and you see the shifty eyes, avoidance of conversation, and slow backing away, you'll know why. Coincidentally, it's the same reaction I get from people when I tell them we don't do Santa!
Now I'm sure I'm about to get crucified here but I'm just going to say it: We have 4 kids and we don't do Santa. And before you ask me, no, we don't do the Tooth Fairy or the Easter Bunny either. And just to drive it home that we have completely ruined our kids' childhood, we don't even do Elf on the Shelf. The worst part is that we actually have an elf (because my kids wanted one) but I never remember to hide it. And my son likes to remind me that I forgot by hurling "Elfie" at me first thing in the morning with an exasperated sigh.
I don't have any grand reasons for not encouraging Santa Claus. It seemed reasonable to skip the whole thing since my husband didn't do Santa growing up. And I remember when I was about 7 or 8 and feeling so betrayed about being "lied to" when I found out that Santa wasn't real. Although to be fair, I probably should've realized something was off as I was thumbing through the latest Service Merchandise catalog and my mom told me that Santa could only afford to make $50 worth of toys!
I guess it just felt wrong to tell my kids something that wasn't true, especially when it involved a stranger breaking into our house while they slept, even if he was bringing toys. I'm not trying to come off as some sanctimonious parent and I can't claim to always be 100% truthful to my kids. There are definitely times that I have withheld the truth--like when my oldest son was 6 and he asked me what sex was. I told him that we could talk about that or we could go get ice cream-thankfully he chose the ice cream. Or when I would set the house alarm and twins thought that meant that if you weren't out in time, the house was going to explode. I never told them that was true but I didn't exactly discourage it either (I mean, do you know how hard it is to get 4 kids out of the house in a timely manner??).
Of course I realize that parents aren't trying to "lie" to their kids and are just encouraging the magical element of childhood but it just seems weird to me. But really that's not my biggest reason for doing it. Selfishly, I don't like the idea that we work hard to pay for these gifts and some imaginary character gets the credit. Somehow that just doesn't seem fair. I work hard to pay for the presents, I have to track down that hot toy of the season (I swear I have PTSD from the fingerling fiasco of 2017), and then I have to somehow secretly wrap all these presents in the 5 minutes that the baby naps! And boy do I wrap them. Every. Single. Thing. I mean, I'll wrap a pencil if I can. Have you ever tried to unwrap a pencil? It's awful. There's more tape than there is wrapping paper. Eventually you just give up. And if that's not bad enough, I make them open presents one at a time so I can stare at them expectantly, making sure they are responding with the appropriate amount of excitement. I just soak it up.
So, if you see my kids in public and you ask them what Santa is bringing them and you see the shifty eyes, avoidance of conversation, and slow backing away, you'll know why. Coincidentally, it's the same reaction I get from people when I tell them we don't do Santa!
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